Should You Die For Love?

This is a question that is frequently asked by the majority. Many people will say no but you can be rest assured that some will definitely say yes.If I am to rephrase the question,it will be"Who can you die for?" Some will say they can die for their lovers, family, best friends.Let us take these views one after the other:
Lovers: Why on earth should you die for a lover? In case you haven't heard, if you as a woman/lady die because of a man or all in the name of love, many men will pass by your grave side and the guy will even eventually hook up with another lady sef. This also applies to men.However, it will be adviseable for you to stay alive and then share this precious love you have with your partner than die and let another person take your place.The best that can happen is that your memory will be kept and cherised.
Best Friends; The truth is that some best friends happen to be closer to us than even our siblings and so we feel like we are of the same blood.I still feel you should stay alive for your friend than allow just your memory get all the reverence.
Family : Initially, i used to feel any life sacrificed for a family member is worth it until I discovered from my Bible that JESUS has died for everyone and has even risen. This simply means that no one needs to die for anybody anymore.If you are in so much pain, trial, sorrow, agony. confusion, distress, call on God and you can be certain that he will answer you.His love is sufficient for us and so we can stay alive and appreciate this great gift.
In the case of lovers, its jealousy, possessiveness, desperacy,  inferiority complex many unsafe habits that makes people believe that they cant do without a person and so they would rather die than loose such person. Believe in yourself and in the love of God that surpasses all other kind of love. You will find yourself enjoying life at its fullest with no worries.
                                                                                                               XOXO
                                                                                                              JAYMAIMAH

Different Views Of Love On Valentine,s Day

      Majority of humans have different definitions about love and the significance on vals day. Most people believe this day to be meant for lovers while some believe it to be a day shared with your loved ones.People's motive for the day also determines/ influences their view and ideology as regards this notorious day. If I am asked to give a definition to Vals day, i will simply say it is a day to show love (GENUINE AFFECTION)to everyone no matter who the person is. Everyday should be about us caring for each other and that will still not jeopardise the significance of the day.
      For couples, everyday should be your vals day. If you happen to look forward to just the 14th of every February to be loved and showered with gifts or attention, then you need to have a re check on why you are in that relationship. If you happen to bemarried, make it your duty henceforth to make every day a Vals day for your partner and let He/She see reasons to why it should be so.Gradually, you will start to experience Love in  a TRUE dimension.  Its sad to know that a lot of misconducts go on all in the name of celebrating love on Vals day. God himself shows us love and even celebrated it for us. we can see this in John 3:16
For God so loVed the world
          that he gAve his
                    onLy begotten son
       that whosoEver
         believes iN him
            shall noT
                   perIshbut
   have everlastiNg
                     lifE.
       I will on another edition talk about love but lets focus on what is best advised to be done on this day. Naturally, we humans tend to sub consciously smile when we see another happy, also when we see a person crying or sad, it affects us.We can spend the day visiting the needy, giving them gifts or spending some time with them, hereby making them feel happy and not alone in this world.The more we bless people, we are also being blessed in return.Its not all about the money, its about what we have to offer to help make another person better. I am not against couples spending time with each other on this day, i believe that is done most of the time. You might be too busy on a normal day to see these less privileged ones, why dont we you both spend the day with these people then maybe spend your private time later over dinner. Our loved ones also shouldn't be left out, show them some love. Ordinary calls and text messages is sufficient enough to show how much care and you remember them.
         I can vouch that some people who are not even married will get pregnant,wrongfully dis-flowered , heart broken duped,broke and devastated due to their wrong notion of this day. Some acts of the day will even lead to another person  getting an abortion or going in sane. All these silly and unfortunate occurrences can be avoided if one sets his / her mind correctly from the inception. We deserve more than we dish out to ourselves and we can make this day a wonderful one for another if we do it right.
                                                                                                       XOXO
                                                                                                        JAYMAIMAH

Dealing With Your Man's Family

  Dear woman         

             Has it really occurred to you that your husband’s family is now yours? I am sure it has, you have just decided not to accept it. By virtue of marriage, you are one with your husband and so, his family is now yours. If you are married to a family that loves and respects you hereby treating you as their own, congratulations. If you happen to be on the other side, “don’t give up. You are exactly what that family needs to get better”Ladies,you also need to learn these things even before you get married so as to avoid some unnecessary hassles.

          There are some vital virtues that you must instill in yourself and live with for the rest of your life in other to enjoy being with your new family. Do not make the mistake of thinking or believing that marriage cuts you off from your first family. It only gives you more and adds to your blessings. Love and respect them like you do to yours. The following virtues will be illustrated and better explained:

LOVE: This knows no bounds and no matter what they do to you or how they make you feel, love them all the same. Lets be honest and face it, some people are hard to love. Loving them does not make you a fool to be tripped on, it only means that you are a mature, tolerant person with a good and big heart who is smart enough to know that you must live long to be the mother to your children and the woman your husband wakes up to see beside him all his life. Its not easy loving the harsh in laws but all the same, learn to overlook their atrocities and forgive them. When the memories of how bad you are being treated comes up, suppress them and leave the tense, hateful atmosphere behind then move on living life and treating them like nothing bad ever happened between you. Before you know it, you wont be bothered by their attitude anymore.

FORGIVENESS: It’s hard to forgive and even harder to forget but guess what, there is one perfect reason that helps you to forgive, “you don’t want to die young”. Research has confirmed that people who hold grudges, have a high risk of having “high blood pressure, hypertension, unrequited anxiety over little irrelevant things”. The best way to understand this ailment is by knowing someone who is suffering from them, talk to this person and find out what they are going through then you will agree with me that no one Is worth making you fall sick. Have you ever realized that when you see someone you have not forgiven, your heart beats fast and you get uncomfortable. Some of you even give them the chance of occupying your mind and head hereby resulting into a terrible headache. My dear, nobody is worth your pain most especially when its for a bad reason or cause.

RESPECT: This has no age limitation. You are to respect everyone ranging from the oldest to the youngest person in that family. This includes friends. Your lack of respect will not help matters and you will never be respected or honored. Regard the adults and old ones in the best manner possible; also treat the young ones with tolerance. They will surely and definitely anger you on occasions. If you are a temperamental and outspoken person, walk away and try to cool off somewhere else. If you are a cool headed and tolerant person, try to relax. When you feel less angered and in a good/right frame of mind, call the person, talk to the person and bare your mind in a calm and non judgmental manner. No matter the response, your conscience gets free and you can live a grudge free life. Please note that”it is bad to be on the old ones’ bad record and it is worse to be on the young ones’ black book.

                 These virtues are not easy to instill in ourselves. It’s easier said than done but you can be rest assured that when it is successfully instilled, you will be referenced by your new family whether they like it or not. Till our next edition, please heed my advice.                                                                                       
                                                                                                                                                    XOXO
                                                                                                                                                    JAYMAIMAH

Make Love Not Have Sex

      First and foremost,i will not judge whoever is sexually active outside wedlock although God specifically asked us to leave that wonderful and mysterious act of the soul till we are joined as man and wife.However,a very large percent of our relationships are destroyed or crumbles due to the little things we take for granted.I will be advising the married women and you can regard this as a LETTER TO THE MARRIED WOMEN FROM A SINGLE LADY. We the single ladies can also learn from this because we definitely do not want to have to share or loose our husband to one toothpick girl due to our negligence or ignorance. Men, if you agree with me,please say something and if you don't,i stand to be corrected since you know more about yourself than we do. We are just trying to learn and please your royal highness      

           Have you really sat down to think about what exactly you are doing when you are having an intercourse with your husband whether its sex you are having or it is love you are making? If you have not, please do it now. Let me give you a simple definition of the two terms. “Sex” is the regular and natural act of having an intercourse while “lovemaking” is the act of commuting on a deep, personal level with your husband through intercourse. The aftermath of sex lasts for a period while the aftermath of lovemaking lingers in your mind, making you crave for more and look forward to the next sensual experience. Sex tends to be fun only when you both are in the mood while lovemaking brings the mood to you and you get engulfed in it .Sex is had by every sexually active person but love is made by rare and few people.

                This major differences  between sex and lovemaking are one’s mentality, level of care, commitment, understanding and the motive/intention to communicate with your husband in a way no one else can.This might sound weird or strange to you but the act of intercourse Is not all about making babies or satisfying our urge. Its about reaching out to your partner and enveloping yourselves in your private world where there are no secrets and you take yourselves as you are. You have the rare chance of seeing deep into each other’s soul and knowing that your partner is the only person who can understand you on that level and make you feel safe and loved.

              Some people think that when they have good sex, they have made love while bad sex is just as it is…..”Sex”. The most unique and interesting thing about making love is that there is never a bad sex moment, no matter the mood you are in. You can make love when you are happy, sad, angry tensed, confused, in short, every mood you find yourself. I am sure you are wondering how possible it is that you can make love when you are in a bad mood, that is where your level of care, commitment and ability to communicate is highly tested. Your partner should be able to know what mood you are in without you saying it but when you make love with him. This also includes reaching out and baring your soul to each other therefore speaking a special language that only the both of you understand.

              It has been scientifically and objectively proven that you tend to feel relieved and better no matter how bad you feel after a sexual release also known or referred to as “cum”. These are ways you can create a love making, exciting, sensual and strong relationship with your husband.

-The use and practice of foreplay. Do not expect your man to figure out what gets you going all by himself, he is not psychic. Tell him where you desired to be touched, also ask him what he wants you to do to him and do it. Remember, you are your husband’s whore and no other woman should be able to give it to him better than you.

-Talk about your sex life and create the atmosphere even before you get down. This might be through text messages, calls, a little note slipped into his pocket with a lipstick smear on it etc. Talk about your sexual fantasies and you should try fulfilling them together no matter how crazy or nasty it seems as far as its not harmful to your health or a risk to your lives.

-Its high time you stop restricting yourself to one style which is the oldest style commonly referred to as the “missionary style” also known as the “mummy and daddy style”. After a while, this style tends to get boring, restrictive and kills the sexual excitement faster. Eating a particular meal all the time gets tiring and boring, its nicer and more hygienic when you eat different healthy meals. Research on and learn new styles together, there is no harm in creating and customizing your own styles.

-Do not restrict yourselves to the bedroom alone. Of what use is the couch, bathroom, floor, kitchen, table, car, pool, office (if possible)? They are all great spots to try out.

-Develop the habit of having “quickies” aside from the regular long sex. Its exciting and the memory tends to linger on your mind hereby creating a sort of elation and craving for the next great moment.

-Do not sleep with your husband only when you are in the mood and do not look at making love as a duty but a means of communicating and bonding with him. If he is the one who wants it and you are in a bad mood, let him have his way and please program your body to be responsive to his touch irrespective of your mood.

-Drop all your guards and let the sensations flow. Never worry about your “ringtone” or reaction towards an immeasurable pleasure that hits you at any time. Free your mind, don’t be shy, he is your husband.

-Dress sexy by wearing flimsy and seductive cloths for him in the house. You can be all decent and reserved outside but  not inside. Men tend to be controlled by what they see.

              Love making is like a unique meal, eaten, savored and appreciated as it tickles the brain and pleasures the body. It leaves a memory and tingling sensation that overcomes your being when you think of how you wiped your plate clean, hereby making you want more therefore making you look forward to another great and sensual experience. Ponder on my words and try them. Till our next edition, have fun trying.

                                                                                                                                                    XOXO

                                                                                                                                                    JAYMAIMAH

Facts Of Life

Hey everyone,I want to let you in on a funny fact of life.I hope that you humorously reason with me although I stand to be corrected.
Over kaku emphasis on academics:
You see ehn,the rate at which we over do this book thing na die. When it comes to weighing our academic prowess with our achievements, lets face it...........most of those who struggle and come out with a FIRST CLASS are so bright that they occupy the technical positions such as directors, managers etc. Those who come out with SECOND CLASS are smart enough to acquire MBA, become administrators and control the first class. Those with the THIRD CLASS go into politics, hit it big and control both the first and second class.The most ironic of all are those who came out with a PASS or FAIL. Some join the underworld and control ALL CLASS. On a more lighter note,why do we stress our brain on top this same book na. Even the oyinbo that brought education to us do not read as much as we Nigerians dey take read book. I have tried to acquire LLB (glory be to God) and I am currently learning so as to get a BL(by God's grace). Once I get that one, nobody should even ask me to go for my MASTERS. The only thing on my mind after this BL is to make A LOT OF CASH, further my career and acquire the next reasonable forever degree which we ladies know as  MRS. Ladies if you are down with me, say YEAH!!!!  if not, I feel your zeal to read all the book in the world but no forget say our fore mothers and forefathers that said  all a woman's book ends in the kitchen may have been a little over the edge but are still on point. Maybe later, I might try to get a diploma degree in Psychology. This I am doing, so that I wont only advise you on issues from experience alone but also from an academic and psychological point of view.Till the next edition.........
                                                                                                          XOXO
                                                                                                          JAYMAIMAH

My First Blog Ever !!!!!!!!!

       Wow!!! this is more like the only thing I can say.How can a computer literate with a diploma from CT computer school(na one place like that for ojuelegba) not have a blog spot?Am sure you will ask yourself the same question.I get to use the internet everyday and i am filled with so much experience that I would love to share with you about my world but somehow, it did not occur to me to create one, not until today that I happen to be updating my first mini laptop(na gift ooo) on the internet. Let me tell you a little about me.My names are Oluwayemisi, Anuoluwapo, Oluwadamilola,Ayobami, Agbeke, Egbearhen, Equagbeari,Loveth Jemima. Am sure you are wondering why I have so many names. I am the first born and only girl with 3 brothers. I have LLB(hons) in law, a committed events manager and the owner of heziah7 events, love kids, plantain, gisting, studying (not school books oooo) music, nature, meeting people, travelling., swimming.I am the current welfare officer in Nigerian Law School Kano campus for 2011/2012.Oooops!!! I forgot to add my birthday, who knows, I might be getting gifts. I was born on the 27th day of September.......... You know I wont put the year, I dont want you to know the state of my biological clock. Finally, I am single, although it wont be for long.
        I intend to share some of my experiences with you and you can be rest assured that they are a combination of fun, inspiration, reasoning, fears, dreams, goals, hope and perhaps a little secret. I wont give you all the details of my life, if I do so,there wont be any mystery to me anymore. I will be  nice enough to let you in on a reasonable amount that would make you know me even if you haven't met me. I am a proper African lady with a whole lot of talents.
       I make hair, beads, manicure, pedicure, facials, events, massages, interior decoration, write stories and articles, poems etc. Guys am sure you are wishing your girlfriend was like me (lol). Babes, the truth is behind all these, I am as human as everyone else, I even make a whole lot of mistakes. Some I regret and some I laugh about but most importantly, I get over them all.The good thing about life is, we learn everyday.
       We don't have to make mistakes before we learn, we can learn from other people's own. I hope we can get to relate by you commenting on my ideas and probably criticizing them. You can also ask questions which I will be glad to answer or advice you on if you don't mind. Although I do not have a degree or diploma in psychology, I have been blessed to have had a whole lot of experience with advising and counseling people.Lets put a hold on me for now. On my next article, I will let you in on more serious issues of life that I am very certain you can apply to either your life or that of another person. Lets stop here for now, you will get to know me as the time goes by provided that you hop into the bus that rides you into my world.
                                                                                                      XOXO
                                                                                                      Jaymaimah